Naked Neighbors

I’m not one to make excuses for a lapse in writing. But this time, the excuse is too good not to tell you. Dennis and I were prevented from posting because we were recruited to assist in top secret government missions.

Not true. We just slacked off. So. So as to not disappoint in this, our first post of the new year in our international adventure, I would like to tell you about….

Our naked neighbors.

I had long ago decided not to mention them. Not on facebook, twitter, or here. Maybe in the occasional passing story to a friend, but not on a public forum. It’s inappropriate subject matter. And had this been just a one-time occurrence, I could have stuck to my silence. But our neighbors are naked kind of a lot.

But let me rewind. One of the charms of our European living is that our building faces the one across the street. So I think it’s just kind of understood that everyone observes everyone. So we know about the Monty Python posters in the flat of the guys one floor up to the left, we watched and drooled as the stack of Christmas cookie tubs grew taller by the day in the flat directly across and a little to the right, and we know the little old lady one floor down to the left likes to open her window even on the coldest of days and poke her head out to see what’s happening below. But the flat we know the most about is the one directly across from us.

Dennis and I each have a desk in front of the two windows in our living room. The brother and sister across from us each have a desk in front of the windows in their bedroom. You’d think this set-up might result in some awkward stranger stare-offs, but it’s like they don’t even know we’re here.

Maybe that’s why the brother dropped his drawers and headed to the bathroom with only a t-shirt and a parakeet on his shoulder.

Or why the sister was taking pictures of herself in her brassiere.

Or why, tonight, the brother-character tried on a tie in his skivvies.

That’s it. I’m getting the camera out.

Foiled. Here’s a picture of me taking a picture of our half-naked neighbor with his tie.

Here’s a picture of Dennis disapproving.

But before you judge me too harshly for peeping, you should know that I’m nearsighted. As for Dennis, he’s not participating in this tell-all, so who knows what he’s seen.

14 Comments

Hey guess what, Europeans are different. I got used to the nakie ages ago, but photographing your bazooms, and wearing just a tie is plain wrong. Buy them some curtains!

This is grandma on megan’s laptop, This is very funny!! Don’t get cought! Hahaha

At first you had me wrapped up in the story like one of my favorite hitchcock movies but thennnnnn-I started laughing so hard at visualizing you with your camera dodging up and down from the window to the floor to perhaps behind a wall just so they would not see all those flashes. I so have missed you Amy and your Lucille Ball way of making me lol! Happy New Year my funny beautiful friend.

A lot of Europeans think that Americans are uptight. Loosen up a little! Here’s how you do it. Loosen your tie… then loosen your belt… next thing you know you’re lounging in your all-togethers just like Europeans!

Ha ha ha, oh, this made me laugh. Maybe I’m too American in that I’m always aware that my window looks right out on a lawn where all the neighborhood kiddos like to ride their trikes.

1. Since when did you call a bra a brassiere???
2. Do a “Two Sillouettes on the Shade” skit for them (you remember that old rock and roll song.
3. I sure hope I get to observe this European experience when I visit! Sick, I know – Dennis will just have to give me the Evil Eye.

Heh, maybe it is a little sick, but for the record I’ve got no problem watching them. It has been quite entertaining for us. Attempting to take pictures so you can publicly publish them on the internet, however – that just feels like crossing a line. I’ll give you the evil eye for that.

Dennis  •   • 

The best part is the parakeet. Walking around in only a shirt with a parakeet on your shoulder. How could you NOT find that interesting?!? Who does that? Also, if they don’t want their goings-on posted on the internet, they might rethink their wardrobe (lack there of), or invest in some curtains. Oh Europeans.

The funny thing is, we thought they got blinds for Christmas in honor of their new peeping neighbors, but the blinds were only down for a day!

Amy  •   • 

You are such a funny writer and story teller. Too funny. Again this reminds me of my favorite TV show “Friends”… and of course, they all gathered around the window and stared intently everytime ‘naked guy’ came out across the way :)

Hey guys…I gotsta agree with Dennis…I’d pause on the picture-taking, but continue to catalouge their goings-on. Sounds hilarious and maybe you could eventually turn it into some sort of “Everything we learned as cultural (and literal) voyeurs”, retrospective.

I was thinking of the “Friends” sub-plot of the “fat-ugly-naked-guy” too! But remember how that ended up? Rachael eating an orange, in her kitchen–naked…and Ross dashing across the street thinking the gesture was an invitation. That was one of my favorite episodes.

Keep us posted on this, and the rest of your marvelous adventure!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

required
required

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>